tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post2398452562528318712..comments2024-02-15T23:41:36.425-08:00Comments on SIMPLY WAIT: The Woman Who Said NoPatry Francishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10961915797919017179noreply@blogger.comBlogger62125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-71663796296455955832008-02-03T11:14:00.000-08:002008-02-03T11:14:00.000-08:00Non compliant patients do the best, they get bette...Non compliant patients do the best, they get better faster. As a nurse I've always admired my "non-compliant" patients.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-83837706239003676292008-01-30T19:17:00.000-08:002008-01-30T19:17:00.000-08:00What a brave and awesome post. Thank you for shari...What a brave and awesome post. Thank you for sharing your experience and that of the other woman. It reminds me that sometimes we need to stand up for what we want or need, and perhaps risk being 'non-compliant'.suzanneelizabeths.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14304462740451230118noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-91863625615381774202008-01-30T18:26:00.000-08:002008-01-30T18:26:00.000-08:00Warm greetings of health & peace to you!I've been ...Warm greetings of health & peace to you!<BR/><BR/>I've been living with a rare medical condition since I was 30, diagnosed just 4 months after my marriage. <BR/><BR/>It's been quite a ride, and reading your words here - about being an advocate for oneself - I am reminded of how it took me far too long to learn this lesson. As a doctor's daughter I had a blind trust in doctors, and it wasn't until an unsupervised resident nearly killed me with his arrogance & ignorance that I finally stood up for myself.<BR/><BR/>Now, I am still nice but when I need to, I put my my foot down very firmly when it comes to unnecessary Heparin, refusing to take a medication prescribed by a harried resident that does the exact opposite of what I told him I needed, or refusing to be woken up numerous times at night when I am stable enough to be left alone from midnight to 7 am for much needed sleep.<BR/><BR/>You're lucky that someone modeled it for you (in a rather extreme way of course!) and I wish you health, happiness and success with your new book!<BR/><BR/>Warmly,<BR/>Baraka<BR/>http://rickshawdiaries.wordpress.com/2005/06/01/on-illness/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-32395901599547253502008-01-24T13:48:00.000-08:002008-01-24T13:48:00.000-08:00you were a cool room mate Patry. Very non judgemen...you were a cool room mate Patry. Very non judgemental. She sounds lonely to me too.<BR/>These posts are soothing.Mary Sheehan Winnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07739304038978908921noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-79684793577496164222008-01-09T19:05:00.000-08:002008-01-09T19:05:00.000-08:00Children bring such a fresh outlook to every situa...Children bring such a fresh outlook to every situation - even one like cancer! I am always amazed at how resilient my son is. He goes in for a bone marrow test tomorrow - hopefully it will be all good. Just in case we're taking the other children in for blood tests to check if any of them are a possible donor, should the need arise. Caleb, of course, thinks it's only fair that his siblings get a taste of what he's had to endure, though he did say he felt kind of sorry for Quin, who's only 3, because he doesn't understand what's happening.<BR/><BR/>I bet Quin understands more than we know! <BR/><BR/>Hang on to those happy moments - it's what helps sustain you through the worst of any situation!Kenna Coltmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03686484701164499438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-45942684133616073892008-01-04T09:50:00.000-08:002008-01-04T09:50:00.000-08:00Patry,Just a quick note - I put a brief article on...Patry,<BR/><BR/>Just a quick note - I put a brief article on Gather about your book, and your illness. You've had many kind thoughts already. Here's the address for the post:<BR/><BR/>http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.jsp?articleId=281474977220209 <BR/><BR/>Just know that everyone is pulling for you!Kenna Coltmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03686484701164499438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-81265638484737663402008-01-04T08:03:00.000-08:002008-01-04T08:03:00.000-08:00Hi Patry,Great post! I think your roommate is part...Hi Patry,<BR/>Great post! I think your roommate is partially right - that you have to look out for yourself, but I believe you should always be nice, but firm about it. Everyone wants to be treated equally and with respect and she missed the mark here. I'm glad you are doing Ok and wish you the best.apolicastrohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05846543803173199849noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-65860175068990886692008-01-04T07:03:00.000-08:002008-01-04T07:03:00.000-08:00Patry,My heart and prayers are with you through th...Patry,<BR/><BR/>My heart and prayers are with you through this difficult time. It's important that you remember that doctors are human, and fallible. You have every right to question what they order, and refuse if it seems right. If the doctor really thinks it's necessary, he/she will come talk to you about it.<BR/><BR/>It's a hard lesson to learn, I know. My son was in Rainbow with Leukemia in July. I'm sure you can understand the absolute initial terror when you hear that dreaded 'cancer' word. We spent 15 days in the hospital with him being poked, prodded, tested, etc. It was terrible watching my seven-year-old being subjected to it, but I was amazed at his strength!<BR/><BR/>I'm shy by nature, particularly with authority figures, but found that where my son's treatment was concerned, I could overcome it. It was a definite learning experience, and one that I will take with me. <BR/><BR/>I'm happy to report that he is now in remission, and doing well on his targeted chemo. I hope and pray that we'll hear a similar report from you in the near future!<BR/><BR/>All my best,<BR/>KennaKenna Coltmanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03686484701164499438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-23933216409191257812008-01-03T17:24:00.000-08:002008-01-03T17:24:00.000-08:00Dearest Patry - I just caught up with your news an...Dearest Patry - I just caught up with your news and wanted to tell you how terribly sorry I am that you're going through this horrible phase in life. But I'm sure you'll beat it, and go back to writing the best books in the world. I adore your writing, and cherish your friendship. Big hugs and let me know if I can do anything at all for you. ;o)Aaron Paul Lazarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06117814221437165664noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-50134927758375072522008-01-03T15:16:00.000-08:002008-01-03T15:16:00.000-08:00However rude your roommate was, she did have a poi...However rude your roommate was, she did have a point. You should read this book: When the Body Says No: Understanding the Stress-Disease Connection by Gabor Mate. He talks about how repressing emotions and an inability to say no can lead to auto-immune diseases (cancer being one of them).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-83984721758189740152008-01-03T15:03:00.000-08:002008-01-03T15:03:00.000-08:00What an experience. Could've been another nightma...What an experience. Could've been another nightmare hospital roommate story, and you find a way to pull out the gem. (there you go, being you ...) <BR/><BR/>Still sending love your way. DebAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-22788749256335740932008-01-03T07:03:00.000-08:002008-01-03T07:03:00.000-08:00Your story is a wonderful example of how we learn ...Your story is a wonderful example of how we learn from one another, even in the most difficult of circumstances. It sounds like the woman who was always complaining and saying no had a difficult life - after all, more flies are killed with honey than by shouting and being rude to people. I'm glad you questioned your care and are doing what feels right to you. xoxoxparis parfaithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05457437124988976587noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-66029832413676671472008-01-02T13:44:00.000-08:002008-01-02T13:44:00.000-08:00Being a nurse.. I kind of see both sides to this. ...Being a nurse.. I kind of see both sides to this. I also understand the feelings of loss of control that come with being a patient.. the entire atmosphere of a hospital perpetuates this feeling. But I also know that any patient who says no will have their wishes respected. At the same time.. the "no" has to be documented so that the physician who ordered the treatment is aware that the caregiver did indeed attempt to fulfill the order. I guess the biggest thing with all of this is that one does not have to be rude or hurtful when saying no. Like most things there is both a right way and a wrong way to go about it. And also.. like in most things.. interpretation is everything.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-45459563690578134162008-01-02T12:51:00.000-08:002008-01-02T12:51:00.000-08:00I've not gotten over to 'see' you for awhile... my...I've not gotten over to 'see' you for awhile... my goodness you've been going through so much! I'm sorry to hear about your cancer, and hope you have been getting the help you need. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers as the new year comes. Blessings on you and yours.suehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17087761009975204727noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-22701172751644859412008-01-02T11:12:00.000-08:002008-01-02T11:12:00.000-08:00Patry...what a great post! Your roommate sounds li...Patry...what a great post! Your roommate sounds like some of our firms clients(I work for a law firm the does Social security disability law). I hear the term non-compliant almost every day. Non-compliance and balance. Yin and yang. Ding and dong. Your post is a classic and you are a master story teller! Happy New Year!Fred Garberhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06308938520063396329noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-6926919994771888792008-01-02T10:43:00.000-08:002008-01-02T10:43:00.000-08:00Patry, I hadn't checked your blog in a while and w...Patry, I hadn't checked your blog in a while and when I did and saw all these new posts at first I was excited you were blogging again and then. . . not. I am so so sorry to hear of what you are going through and I am sending blessings and good wishes your way. I pray that you will fully recover and write all about it in your wonderful way. Best wishes for a new year filled with recovery. Love & hugs.Laini Taylorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14064837312936707024noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-65048946959683859862008-01-02T00:58:00.000-08:002008-01-02T00:58:00.000-08:00It seems sometimes our teachers come in the unlike...It seems sometimes our teachers come in the unlikeliest forms. From the civility of her last comment to you, it sounds as though at least a little of your kindness might have influenced her as well. <BR/>Thank you for the kindness you've shown me - it means more than I can say. Sending so many good wishes your way for the New Year, Patry.((hugs))Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-14026932164335445192008-01-01T23:40:00.000-08:002008-01-01T23:40:00.000-08:00So glad I finally took the time to stop by, Patry,...So glad I finally took the time to stop by, Patry, even if it is in the middle of the night! Two more gems for your collection. A joy to read and more, kiddo. I'll be back soon! K.Sustenance Scouthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12980573661955592633noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-4934173886117087702008-01-01T22:40:00.000-08:002008-01-01T22:40:00.000-08:00Good luck, Patry! I hope this surgery does the tri...Good luck, Patry! I hope this surgery does the trick and you're back home soon. I also hope that I don't get a roommate like yours after my surgery tomorrow morning.Bella Standerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09299907503543643337noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-68707302311535559612008-01-01T18:21:00.000-08:002008-01-01T18:21:00.000-08:00Love you, Patry.Love you, Patry.LitParkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17522150687696351583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-89796074869923237842008-01-01T17:52:00.000-08:002008-01-01T17:52:00.000-08:00"Non-compliant" and "balanced" -- good things to p..."Non-compliant" and "balanced" -- good things to practice every day.<BR/><BR/>I've often admired those who say no, and REALLY mean it when they say it. They seem like they know what they want, but maybe they don't...maybe their no is only a reflex, a stock answer. Maybe your roommate's boyfriend that she argued with could have taken care of her a bit, but instead, she said no.<BR/><BR/>Balance, the middle road, is where it's at. A bit of yes, a bit of no. Nothing is ever perfect. Our lives are works in progress -- we find our balance as we go along.<BR/><BR/>Your post has given me a lot to think about. Though I've always been an optimist, I still wonder if those constant nay-sayers somehow have an inside track on something I'm missing...<BR/><BR/>Wishing you a happy new year full of love, light, stories, learning, balance, and some healthy non-compliance along the way. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-47913731373014579102008-01-01T17:38:00.000-08:002008-01-01T17:38:00.000-08:00Wow an awesome story, I think somewhere there is a...Wow an awesome story, I think somewhere there is a balance, between saying no & being unkind, <BR/>but we all have our ways. I will pray for you and your room mate of old.<BR/>God Bless, Deena<BR/><BR/>the inflates are hot, but they help in ways we need them..so <BR/>I'll be back my friend<BR/><BR/>fondly,<BR/>deenaSweetAnneehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13707990672213846323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-47009737598992129892008-01-01T17:08:00.000-08:002008-01-01T17:08:00.000-08:00jessie: You are so right. Here's to using more of ...jessie: You are so right. Here's to using more of that "wild power" in 2008! <BR/><BR/>marilyn: Mirrors are such fickle items, aren't they? Sometimes reflecting what we want to see, and other times showing us what we need to see.<BR/><BR/>jean: Thanks so much for your continued support and love. I hope to get back to work on novels soon. In fact, today I outdid myself: I wrote 18 words.<BR/><BR/>mai wen: She had the kind of loud, clear voice that is easy to capture. I won't easily forget it.<BR/><BR/>r: As I remember, you've saved me from my own trusting nature more than once. Maybe I needed you in the hospital, too?<BR/><BR/>Sally: That's the best kind of wish/blessing I could get. Thank you!<BR/><BR/>Laura: Actually, I haven't been walked on--not because I'm very assertive (I'm not) but because I'm pretty good at avoiding mean people. If you can do that, you never need to scream "NO!" too loudly.<BR/><BR/>Sky: Actually, I think you strike quite a perfect balance between strength and love. That's what we're all aiming at.<BR/><BR/>...more later.Patry Francishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10961915797919017179noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-42707709669323499592008-01-01T15:52:00.000-08:002008-01-01T15:52:00.000-08:00Maryanne: "the deeper truth of fiction"--It really...Maryanne: "the deeper truth of fiction"--It really is, isn't it?Patry Francishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10961915797919017179noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11695927.post-59502335778332911712008-01-01T15:03:00.000-08:002008-01-01T15:03:00.000-08:00Yea! Patsy. I got a shiver at the end at your smal...Yea! Patsy. I got a shiver at the end at your small victory. But you'll never be like your room mate and I'm so glad. And I am one who would think later about the words "non-compliant" in my chart and feel misunderstood and labeled. <BR/><BR/>This little story enthralled me. I couldn't guess where it was going. I'm glad the Berlin Wall had some cracks in it and some common ground to be shared. <BR/><BR/>Thank you for sharing and allowing us to feel connected to your life.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com